Wednesday, March 11, 2009

My cuss-free weekend expereriment for The Star.

Copied from R.age,The Star

Well sorta.....

NOT AT ALL ACTUALLY. I was asked to do this experiment last week. I didn’t prepare anything. I thought that I rarely swear or use any profanity. I was wrong. Here are the blog posts of my weekend.

* The expletives in quotation marks are mostly monologues, either spoken silently to myself or just yelled out loud in my mind.

* (32) – Number of expletives I used over the weekend.


DAY ONE, March 7 2009 Saturday

TET TET TET TET. Alarm clock rang! It’s 8am. “F***!(1) I have a Fashion Design replacement class”, on Saturday morning. I went to the university. I reached school at 9.58am, and “S***……”(2) the class had started at 30 minutes ago. I was late. All eyes were on me. Thanks to the so called three easy steps facial care. I take approximately twenty minutes every morning to apply cream on my face, but I still have breakouts. I got a new one to day. “What the F***?”(3), right? 

It was a presentation day, so all the kids came up with their “bl**dy”(4) lame subject matters as inspiration for their designs. Wayang Kulit, Face Painting, Stained Glass, and even Chandeliers. “Bodoh gila”(5+6), I whisper to myself. How can someone be inspired from those “bored-to-death”(7) man-made objects. And the most “f***ed-up”(8) subject matter came from an Iranian girl. She chose Fire as her inspiration, and took 20 minutes to explain facts that I’ve read 7 years back in school! Not to mention her ‘s***y’ presentation skills. Just imagine someone who has very fake blond hair, standing in front of the class room and moving her mouth without letting any sounds out. “what a c***!”(9) I might not have the same perspective as her on fire, but I’m quite sure that my lecturer shares the same thoughts with me, by the way he squinted his eyes.

12.30pm, the class finished. I went to the roofless car park, and “Bl**dy Hell”(10), it was raining - heavily. Ran into my car, slammed the door and……

“@!#$^%&*()(%^$#%^&%^^$#_+[Malay swear words included]”(17)

“I am all wet!”

March 8 2009 Sunday.

After class yesterday, my big family and I went to a bungalow resort in Morib, Selangor. We were having some sort of family getaway. I didn’t sleep until about 4 am last night. We were having so much fun joking, gossiping, and b****ing(24). My aunties; Aunty La and Mak Lang are beyond funny. My Aunty La is brilliant when it comes to imitating people’s behavior. Hilarious!

Less than 3 hours of sleeping, at around 6 am, I was awaken by the very loud laughter of my cousins. I changed into my swimming shorts and headed to the beach. “Damn”(25), the water was like 28 miles away from the beach. I wonder why is that. 10 years ago, when I visited this place, it was the same. I need some geographical explanation.

Headed back to the chalet, the breakfast was ready, and my two favorites aunties were already up. When you are at a nice chalet with your two favourite aunties, what else you can do, other than gossiping and talk dirty,…………………….

)(*&^*%%$#@!#^*&^&LAUGHTER(*&^%$76(***((**%#@#>?<><>*^*%^%^^^I$%^^&^^ hahahahahahaahHAHAHA! (32)

I had fun.

Well, in conclusion I am just a normal human being who lives his not-so-normal life as a 19-year-old.
Needless to say, this experiment was a total failure for me. But **** that!

Jumpa lagi, A bientot

Sunday, March 1, 2009

I want to be her. Really.



You are not a musical actress if you married a minister, take his millions and create a succesful old malay myth musical. you are just a succesful musical producer.

You should have upgraded that 'Art School' instead of closing it.

We need more Yasmin Ahmad, Rosnah Mat Aris, and Siti Nurhaliza in this country.

And I think Zaiton Sameon is really good.

Jumpa lagi, A bientot.